As I was laying on my bed earlier today, singing my heart out to Rascal Flatts, Carrie Underwood, Taylor Swift, SHeDAISY, and a number of other various artists, i've realized one thing I'm a bit ashamed of… I'm afraid to love.
Somewhere in my mind i've come to the conclusion that to love is to force yourself through unnecessary pain. Sure love has it’s pros, but it’s quite terrifying if you sit to think about it. ‘Love’ can literally kill you. It’s strong enough so it can break even the strongest (wo)man, but so delicate that it’s what we’re made of. It made me think, “There’s so much love in this world, but it’s directed at all the wrong things.” There’s the love for money, love for power, love for lust… We all aim our love in the wrong places. That there is why love is so painful. Love is something that should never end. And it’s true, love doesn’t end. It’s not that someone stops loving the other person in a relationship; it’s the fact that one loves the other too much, and the other loves back too little. If all of us weren’t so focused on our lives and took a moment to think we’d all agree that ‘love’ really is what makes the world go round. Love is what helps us exist, to survive, to endure life’s hardships. We aren’t in fact living for ourselves, but for something we love.
It’s like horseback riding. You’re afraid to get on the horse because you’re not sure if it’s the right match for you. You try to talk yourself out of it thinking of the consequences, but you put your foot in the stirrup, swing your leg over, and settle in for the ride. At first, things are easy. Then the pace picks up. This is where I think most relationships seem to have a difficult time; the trot. It’s bumpy, and if you don’t prepare yourself or sit yourself properly you’re bound to have a super rough ride. Some people can’t handle this and they stop. Others hang on tightly only to eventually give up. But some… some hang on for dear life. And no matter how far to the slide they slip they grit their teeth and hang on, attempting to pull themselves back into the saddle. If they succeed, they learn how to cope with the jarring and position themselves correctly in the saddle, posting to the trot to lessen the bouncing. And as time passes, you feel more confident and take things to the next level; the lope. It’s one of the best feelings in the world. Nothing like feeling the wind in your face, the pounding of hooves, sitting astride a magnificently molded animal; this is when everything in the relationship is going smoothly, easily. And after a bit of this pace, you kick in to the limit; the gallop. Every stride you go through brings you and your significant other closer and closer together. Things between you develop even faster and you feel as if you could never love each other more. But as the pace quickens, so does your love.
Depending on what kind of trail you’re riding it’s impossible to say it’s smooth galloping from there on out. I believe no road is without its consequences or obstacles. The horse is love. The paces you put your horse through are the phases in your relationship. And lastly, the trail… the trail will always be a twisting trail through forest, desert, mountainous terrain, ….
MAJOR DISTRACTION, BYE.
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